Thanks to Bucky Lasek for making us chuckle with this Craigslist ad shared on his Facebook page today. This dude (presumably) in Troy, New Hampshire is selling his beloved 2000 Subaru Outback Drift Tank. It’s not that he doesn’t love his baby but needs the dough to build his next drift car based on a (get this) 1980 Ford Pinto. Good luck with that one, fella.

 

wow such drift. very subaru. omg much jdm. – $2500 (Troy)

I must warn you. If you don’t like that feeling of pure terror as you’re sliding sideways into something dangerous, leave now. I’m selling my 2000 Subaru Outback Drift Tank to the first lucky owner to hand me a reasonable amount of cash. This car is so JDM it’s disgusting, despite the fact that it was manufactured in the glorious state of Indiana. It has something like 230,000 miles if I remember right. It was treated well for the first 220,000 miles or so, and has been beaten relentlessly since. BUT. It drifts really well. 90% of people hate it, but the other 10% love it. And of that 10%, .05% are girls. So really, this thing will drop like at least a panty or two during your ownership. Not a bad price if you’re into that sort of thing.

Here’s a list of mods that I’ve done to the poor girl.

RWD conversion (Welded center diff, front axle shafts taken out of the cv joints)
Welded rear diff (wow such slide)
Raceland coilovers (rides like sh*t, but it’s fun)
Fully stripped interior.
Racing wheel with quick release.
Hydro Ebrake
2 17×7 Drag DR-9’s on the front
15″ forester steelies on the rear
Lowered 6.5″ from stock
Added 1.5 degrees of caster to front suspension
SUPER JDM rising sun fender.
WAY MORE JDM rusted fender (omg so trendy)
2″ boso pipe.
Single catted straight pipe with zero muffling. Neighbors love that sh*t.
“drift slut” spraypainted in rainbow on rear bumper (so tasteful!)
Removed rear bumper beam.
Removed ac.
Disabled abs
No airbags.
Power steering cooler.
Fenders rolled with care and a big f*ckin’ hammer.

It’s terrible, it’s sick, it’s ugly, and it slides. Buy it, so I have room in my yard and cash to build my next drift car, a 1980 pinto I just bought. The cash may also go towards funeral arrangements when I inevitably die in a fiery rear-end crash.

Call/text/email.
Reasonable offers strongly considered.
Ridiculous offers also considered, but not as strongly.

You know you want it.

And I need the cash for more dangerous sideways fun.

Direct Link: https://nh.craigslist.org/cto/4487450896.html